Friday, May 16, 2008

Goodbye to...

This is more about me and less about Evan, but I feel the need to reflect (i.e. ramble) so please bear with me...


I've discussed my breastfeeding woes before on this blog, and in response got the much needed support to keep trying; But for many reasons, I've decided to wean Evan from the breast. Well, actually, the process is complete, prompting me to reflect on my (our) experience.

Once I became pregnant with Evan, I knew I wanted to breastfeed. There wasn't any doubt about it. And despite what I read about problems some women experience with breastfeeding, I just assumed I'd be ok. So when I initially had trouble, it really was depressing, and I felt like a failure. Maybe because we had such a hard time getting pregnant in the first place, I felt as if breastfeeding was just another "natural" thing I couldn't do naturally. Like there was something wrong with me as a woman.

Just so no one assumes I'm weaning Evan because of those problems, let me assure you that things actually turned out fine. In fact, the more I tried to cut down on the nursing, the more I realized that there probably never was a supply issue to begin with. Instead, there was a confidence issue brought on by Evan's slow weight gain (which I felt better about once I got a hold of the WHO growth charts based on breastfed babies). And, to get a little technical, I think the slow weight gain was due to oversupply and a foremilk/hindmilk issue. I started to suspect this a while back, and became sure when I went for my last breast massage session with the midwife. Just when I thought my supply was dwindling (especially because I wasn't as plagued with plugged ducts as I had been earlier), she said that I was in the best shape breastfeeding-wise than I had been in the five months I'd been seeing her. Apparently I had finally adjusted to Evan's milk needs.

So then why quit now? Well, that's a complicated story I won't go into here (that's a first!!). But having decided to wean, the process has been making me a little sad. I'm sure a part of it has to do with hormonal changes, but every day I feel like I'm letting go of a special bond to Evan. Of course, non-breastfeeding moms (and dads) do just fine connecting to their babies, and even breastfeeding moms eventually wean their babies. But 6 months just seems so young...Every time I see a mom breastfeeding her baby, I get all teary.

And what about Evan? Well he's adjusting just fine. I suppose he has less of an attachment to nursing than he might have had later.

Anyway, as I started to sense that we may be into our last week of nursing I decided I'd like to have some pictures taken. The picture above is the most blog-appropriate one (not that I really think any of the other ones are inappropriate...). But after we took that picture, one day passed without nursing, then two, then three, and then I realized that we had reached the end.

I called the midwife to schedule an appointment to express the remaining milk, and went there a few days ago. It was about two weeks after the last time I nursed, but I was still producing milk; lots of it. We laughed that I ever thought I had a supply issue. For a second (or two), I thought about changing my mind.

Of course, I won't, especially because Evan has finally started to drink (formula) well, and is growing steadily. But I do know that despite how stressful it all was, I'm glad I gave breastfeeding my best shot. And, should we be blessed with another baby, I know I'd do it all over again (and if possible until the child weans her/himself).

The midwife and I even talked about a "game plan" to help get me off to the right start the next time around, but that's for another post (or not...maybe I'll just keep that to myself.)

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